Lori Miller is the SPN member of the week due to her being all about helping other people. She is a mental health professional and coach who helps people discover the power they already have. Lori shows people how to use that power to lead their lives in a happier direction.
Her mission is to encourage people to find better ways to cope with their stress at work. Whether you are the CEO or just starting out, we are all trying to be our best and do good work. We are also dealing with stress. How we deal with it makes a difference, so it’s my pleasure to introduce Lori here.
Stressed out and miserable at work?
In the last 20 years, technology has overhauled how we perform our work. It’s also completely changed how we interact with each other. Trying to keep up with it all can be overwhelming. It’s easy to feel frustrated and helpless trying to get through each day.
Lori’s passion is to challenge people to take real actions to master their stress at work. She provides strategies to keep the focus on doing good work and creating new opportunities to grow.
Lori Miller- The Personal Side
Craig Wasilchak: What is your true mission here on social media?
Lori Miller: To share some practical wisdom on ways to manage stress at work. Since I was very young, people have told me they feel better after talking to me. I understand now that it’s my biggest gift. Social media has given me a voice and a platform to encourage more people.
Craig Wasilchak: In addition to the serious side of your life, Do you have a fun or unique unknown Gift or Talent that you can share with everyone?
Lori Miller: For many years in my early adult life I was a figure skater. I took a class one day and got completely hooked. It wasn’t too long before I bought custom skates and got a private coach. I started getting up at 4:30 am five days a week so I could get some ice time and train before work. Looking back I can’t believe I was so consistent and sold out. In fact, if I’m honest, I haven’t been that way about anything since.
Skating taught me so much about discipline and perseverance because there is absolutely no question that you will fall. You don’t learn a jump until you fall about a thousand times. Skating requires tremendous attention to detail to make even the easiest move look good. You have to practice the same thing over and over until you get it right. It’s a daily exercise in determination. I’m hoping to get back on the ice next year because I miss that daily chase (and being in great shape). I want to accomplish some other long-term goals first this year.
Lori Miller – the personal side
I have always been the trusted sidekick. In my earliest friendships and especially at work, I was always the one people came to for input or advice. I was that girl in the cubicle who always seemed to know exactly what to say. I guess I was good at seeing things objectively.
What I was not good at was seeing myself objectively. I went into adulthood with some pretty unhealthy rules for how to look at my life.
It never occurred to me to push back and challenge the thoughts that told me I wasn’t good enough. Everything I heard inside my head I just took at face value. My need for approval kept me from setting good boundaries with others. This left me handling everyone else’s priorities but my own. I was taken advantage of in my career because I didn’t understand how to be assertive, say no, and ask for what I need.
Thankfully, I had key people in my life who reached out and challenged me. Over time I started to understand how my thoughts and actions affect what actually happens in my life. No one else was going to help me but me. That was the motivation I needed to get intentional and make serious change, and I did!
So when I tell my clients how this works, I know what I’m talking about because I’ve had to do it. It wasn’t an overnight process. It takes an incredible amount of time to change your thinking habits and learn how to decide what thoughts get to stay in your head. With consistent (but not perfect) effort, it can absolutely be done.
Lori Miller – An entrepreneur at heart
My original career plan was to be the next Barbara Walters. I intended to pursue broadcast journalism in college but soon changed my major when I realized it wasn’t a good fit for me.
So I started my own web design firm. Several years later, a Fortune 100 company hired me in their marketing and communications department. It was a perfect fit as the Internet was taking off and becoming part of our daily work. I worked hard, and I was excited at the growth I was seeing in my career.
That’s also where I really learned about stress at work. It was a high performance environment, and I struggled to find ways to keep it all together. I knew I had to make some tough decisions about my life and career.
Soon after I earned a master’s degree in mental health counseling and opened my private practice. Helping the people in my own community has been rewarding. It’s an honor to play a small role in helping someone change something about themselves, or process what’s happened to them.
Along with my clinical experience, my 20 years in the corporate environment has given me a perspective on what people are going through at work. I know what it feels like to struggle to get through the day only to go home exhausted and mentally drained. Then, you get to do it all over again tomorrow.
What I also know is that you don’t have to be a victim of that stress. You have more power than you know to make real change for yourself right where you sit. You just need a new perspective and a belief that you can do it.
A key focus for me this next year is producing content to help people develop that belief and create opportunities for themselves right in the middle of all that stress. I’m releasing a book in March and launching a YouTube show that I’m really excited about.
Learn how Lori Miller helps with stress management
Want to know how to identify stress? Lori breaks down some ways to identify stress and how it may affect your life.
Lori’s Top Social Media Friends
Craig Wasilchak: Who are the TOP 6 Social Media friends that help you grow the most on social media?
Lori Miller: Sharon Gill and Wayne Gill – These amazing attorneys and business owners have had a tremendous effect on me because they are real, straightforward and wise.
Sabrina Permuth – Last year I found an open letter she had posted to LinkedIn about mental health. Her perspective was authentic and honest, so I left her a comment. We’ve struck up a fantastic friendship since then!
Jared J. Wiese – Jared is a top expert in creating LinkedIn profiles that will get you noticed and bring your next opportunity. He churns out so much great, actionable content that you can put in place right away.
Ira Bowman – Ira did the incredibly hard work to create and manage a LinkedIn group called #projecthelpyougrow, which helps people grow their LinkedIn connections. This group helped me make tons of new, terrific friends.
Michael O’Connor – He is tireless with SPN and gives so much all the time. I’m grateful he’s helping so many people find new ways to support each other by focusing on win-wins and just following the golden rule.
Craig Wasilchak: What is one piece of wisdom that you received, that changed your life forever?
Lori Miller: My grandmother lived to be 100 years old. One afternoon, I asked her how she was able to so gracefully go through some difficult times she had talked about through the years. Her answer was simple, “Honey, I either believe God’s going to take care of me, or I don’t.” To me, that was true faith because I know that many times she couldn’t see the way forward. She made an intentional decision to trust in something she couldn’t see. When I struggle I remember this little nugget from her.
Craig Wasilchak: How do you find inspiration?
Lori Miller: I love reading biographies for inspiration. Each one is a story of someone overcoming challenges or working to create something completely new. That inspires me because it’s a real story that actually happened to someone in real life. If that person could accomplish those things, then I can, too.
Craig Wasilchak: What would you say to the 12-year-old version of yourself knowing what you now know?
Lori Miller: Don’t be afraid to use your voice. You have something to say that someone else needs to hear, and you will say it like no one else. Shut out the voices around you, move out of the shadows and take your place.
Craig Wasilchak: Quotes make us stop and think. What is your favorite quote?
Lori Miller & Answer Q: “Don’t be afraid to scrape the paint off and do it again. This is the way you learn, trial and error, over and over, repetition. It pays you great dividends, great, great dividends.” – Bob Ross
Craig Wasilchak’s Caffeinated Questions:
If you could drink coffee with anyone that has ever lived but is no longer living…
- Who would it be? Lucille Ball. I adored her.
- What would you talk about? We would talk about her day-to-day experiences of the business of show business.
- Why? Many people knew her as a comedienne, but there was a very serious side to her craft. She became the first female head of a studio when she became president of DesiLu Productions. I’d love to know how she weathered the challenges and what she did every day to keep her life running.
If you could drink coffee with anyone that is alive today…
- Who would that be? Author, speaker, and human trafficking activist Christine Caine
- What would you talk about over coffee? I want to know how she connects with her purpose with such passion. What kinds of things does she do every day to keep her passion stoked? How does she manage everything on her plate with such grace? She has become one of my heroes because she is so aggressive in going after a nasty industry like human trafficking. How does she work through the doubts that creep in?
- Who is your typical client? My typical clients are professionals who want to find better ways to handle the challenges each day provides. No one at any level of an organization wants to feel stuck and stressed out. My clients are also companies who want to offer their employees practical tools that will help them feel good about coming to work and empowered to continue to bring their best in each day.
Lori Miller helps professionals and companies focus on practical ways to reduce stress at work so they can spend their time doing great work and creating opportunities to grow. Contact her for seminars and speaking engagements at [email protected]. Visit her website at www.LoriMiller.me for articles and videos on how to manage stress, survive changes in the workplace, and create helpful new ways of thinking.